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Morning punters heres the news, steaming hot off the TWF presses.
Honour Roll
Exile
Coach
Beaver
BlueandBlack
Happy
Travelling Gerry
Pruc
The innFORCEr
Jess
Evie
Larry from Joisey
Chook
Jazza
Lonzy
Terri
Emforcer
Well, where does one Pulitzer prize winning reporter start. I have been away on assignment for a few weeks, so i could be a little bit rusty. Anyway lets rip the arse out of it.
Knock on the door at 7.15 and let into da chat house. A few of the usual suspects lurking. Theres X in a corner chewing the fat with some of his tattooed mates. Ah Beaver is skulling fire engines like there is no tomorrow and dribbling on about rowing in the dark, daylight savings was sensational and now it has finished his world has caved in. Whats this rowing caper? in my day i would of already been at work for 3 hours and with another 15 in front of me. No one ever heard me complain. Youth of today is soft. Beav and Pruc harden up. Theres the Happster, he looks less than Happy. Something to do about the right to free speech, communism, cack on the liver, big brother etc. Sit down and have a Magners in the chathouse chill out room with Happy and he perks up.Apparently the problem lies with his golf swing(which i can personally vouch for)
Punters are streaming in through the door. Pleasantries abound.........ah yeah thats right. Theres Coach straight from the barbers and looking as fresh as a bowling ball and stoked that full power has returned to the house after it was disconnected last week. A few of the ladies pop out from the lounge, all having a nice cuppa and a bikkie, except Lonz whos necking straight Vodka and her partner in crime Terri knocking back king browns of Emu Export .
Warning for Miss Evie, these two are trouble on the turps and know their way around O"Malleys well. Brisvegas this doesnt apply to you cause of that bun in the oven.
Kinda weird, spooky atmospheric drop in pressure in da house. No one is talking rugby. Perhaps its the bye, end of daylight savings, David Hicks pleading guilty? who knows. Chatmaster X coughs up and says he got 2 yes 2 tattoos. That stunning swan on the shoulder and another tatt around his nether regions. Apparently we have to wait awhile for photographic evidence as it has to be digitally enhanced.
Gerry who has been the billard room quaffing a cheeky St Hugo and sorting out a nice Montichristo pipes up and says "what about those kind and genereous odds ive been posting lately". Well,hell opens up and Gerry is almost stoned to death with a few billard balls.This has got to be one of the funniest things ive ever seen. Gerry and his valet are last seen driving off in the Roller!
Calm returns to da house. Terri is waffling on about someone stole her blanket? A Irish backpacker is the culprit. X suggests its hide the blanky with a midget bouncer yep so am i.
Lights start to flicker time to foxtrot oscar.
Bouquets
Mitch for sticking Gits at 12 and the ladies naturally.
Brickbats
Going to leave this one alone this week.
Word of the night.
From Chook: minchies..a fusion word for munchies. This is westie english straight from Mino/Cambelltown.
Fellow TWFers extract the digit and come on down to the chat. We will make you feel welcome. Dont be shy.Your only a chat virgin once.
God speed
Tlh