Songs of The Greydemon
Please distribute this far and wide, targeting particularly cricket lovers. This is an attempt to kill off ‘Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi’ which is actually based on a chant popularised by the Welsh comedian Max Boyce.
These may not be the greatest songs in the world but will at least give us some ammunition to fight The Barmy Army!
Print this out, take it to the games, and call out the ‘Hymn number’!
1: Warnie’s gunna ring your sister
Tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic (Glory Glory Hallelulia)
Warnie’s gunna ring your sister
Warnie’s gunna ring your sister
Warnie’s gunna ring your sister
….. When he’s finished talking to your Mum !
2: Snick to the Slips Boys Tune: Click go the Shears
Snick to the slips boys, snick, snick, snick,
When Pigeon is bowling you can only snick
The slips will always catch them
When you snick ,snick, snick
That’s the sound we love to hear
Snick,snick snick
3: Brett Lee is here Tune: Pub with no beer
It’s lonesome away, from your kin folks and all,
On the wild Ashes tour, where the Pom’s wickets fall,
And there’s nothing so funny when Brett Lee is here,
Than to watch a Pom batsman – shaking with fear.
4: Old enough and good enough
Tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic (Again)
Gillie’s older than your father
Langer’s older thanyour grand-dad
Pigeon played with Donald Bradman
….. But they’re still good enough to beat the Poms !
5: M-C-C Tune : That Jackson Five thing ( ABC?)
M-C-C as easy as A-B-C
We come along, sing some songs
Beat some Poms,
Then we all go home for tea
Oh M-C-C as easy as …..(repeat ad nauseam)
6: Who do you think you are kidding Freddie Flintoff ? Tune : Dad’s Army theme
Who do you think you are kidding Freddie Flintoff
When you say you’ll take the Ashes home
We are the boys who will stop your little game
We are the boys who will make them ours again
So who do you think you are kidding Freddie Flintoff
You’re not gunna take the Ashes home.
7: You Poms need a bath Tune: Singing in the Rain
Dooby do doo, dooby, dooby do doo
You Poms need a bath
Yes you Poms need a bath
Pretend it’s your Birthday
Just please take a bath
A shower would do
But un-til then - Phew!
We’re asking you please
Take a bath
Dooby do doo, dooby dooby do doo
8: Our jar of ashes Tune: Guantanamera
WARNING : Not to be sung until we have won them back!
(Though I suppose it could be a statement of intent)
One jar of Ashes
There’s only one jar of Ashes
They’re not your jar of Aaaa-shes
‘Cos they’re OUR jar of Aaa-shes
Repeat several thousand times
9: We will MOCK YOU Tune: Queen ..We will Rock You
Probably not politically correct to have a go about Trescothick but verses can easily be wrtten for any of the Pommy batsmen, I have only written three verses here.
Start with the well known ‘Boom boom clap’ handclap
Tres-cothick is a stressed man, look at him run
Out in the middle he ain’t havin’ no fun
Chorus:
He’s got fear on his face
Can’t take Lee’s pace
Wickets flying all over the place
Singing: We will , we will, MOCK YOU!
We will, we will, MOCK YOU!
Vaughn is the Captain, But he might not play
He’s so scared, in the pavilion he’ll stay
Chorus:
He’s got fear on his face
Can’t take Lee’s pace
Wickets flying all over the place
Singing: We will , we will MOCK YOU!
We will, we will, MOCK YOU!
Jonesey comes from Papua not really a Pom,
But if you think he is a warrior you are really quite wrong
Chorus:
He’s got fear on his face
Can’t take Lee’s pace
Wickets flying all over the place
Singing: We will , we will MOCK YOU!
We will, we will, MOCK YOU
All songs written on or about the 14th November 2006 by ‘Greydemon’.
greydemon@ozemail.com.au
