you mean he is not the Messiah?
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you mean he is not the Messiah?
Cue......
[ame="http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Zjz16xjeBAA"]YouTube - He's Not The Messiah[/ame]
I don't know if this has been mentioned before, but is this Coopers way of getting the ARU's contract offer taken off the table? If it happens doesn't it make his Reds contract null and void therefore freeing him to head to the NRL with SBW? He gets to say I was forced out of Rugby Union by the ARU, no back lash from the Reds fans etc etc.
By Allanthus, 5 Oct 2012 Allanthus is a Roar Rookie
Rugby correspondent Allanthus has obtained a leaked copy of minutes from the latest meeting to negotiate a new contract between the ARU and Quade Cooper. These are reprinted exclusively for Roar readers.
Location: Garden Bar, Coogee Bay Hotel, Sydney.
In attendance: John O’Neill, Matt Dunning, Quade Cooper, Khoder Nasser.
Apologies: Robbie Deans, Sonny Bill Williams.
John O’Neill: Welcome guys, glad you could make it.
Khoder Nasser: What are we doing here? There are people everywhere.
JON: As I’ve always said to Robbie, sometimes the least obvious strategy is the best option.
KN: Hmm…
JON: Ready to order? Quade, why don’t you try the ice cream?
Quade Cooper: Who’s the fat bloke?
JON: I’ve bought Matt Dunning along, he’s our new specialist drop kick coach.
KN: So what’s the latest offer?
JON: Well, we’ve listened carefully to Quade’s concerns and we’re prepared to make some changes.
KN: Excellent.
JON: From next year we’re going to establish a new, permanent, world class training facility on the roof of Star City.
KN: Ok, we’re listening.
JON: And we’ve lobbied the IRB to officially widen the pitch by 10 metres, so Quade’s kick offs don’t go out on the full.
KN: Excellent. What else?
JON: I contacted the NZRFU, they’ve forwarded me an apology from the New Zealand public, personally signed by Richie McCaw.
(JON passes a piece of paper to KN and QC)
QC: What does it say? I can’t read it?
JON: Take those stupid dark glasses off then.
QC: (loses the shades) But I still can’t read it.
KN: It says “Hey Quade, get f**ked”. (to JON) That’s no apology.
JON: That’s your interpretation. I see it as an olive branch. It’s positive that they’re reaching out.
KN: What about an apology from the ARU for providing a toxic workplace and destroying Quade as a person?
JON: Yes, we unreservedly apologise. And to show it, here are two free first class tickets to Argentina for the weekend.
QC: Gee thanks. But I only need one ticket, me and Steph didn’t work out since Kobe nailed a slam dunk.
JON: The other ticket is for Matt.
Matt Dunning: Quade, you plant your left foot, clean drop, follow through smoothly with the kicking foot, and keep your head down.
QC: Keep my head down? I might struggle with that bit.
(JON sits back contentedly, happy with his work)
JON: So do we have a deal?
KN: But he can’t play this week, he’s injured.
JON: So what, so’s everyone else. Matt’s taking his boots too, now that there are uncontested scrums.
MD: Hey, I copped a lot of sh*t for our scrum when it was really Al Baxter’s fault.
JON: There you go, you boys will get on just great – you both know how to stick up for your teammates.
KN: What about the cash?
JON: Well yes, I’ve had to knock that back a little bit. There’s a bit of GFC still hanging around, and a couple of the TV networks are broke. But I’ve arranged for Quade to talk to Willie Ripia about how to maximise earning opportunities.
KN: What if that’s not enough? I want a clause that allows him to box.
JON: Ok, but only if you specify a soft opponent, an old hack who hasn’t beaten anybody of note in years.
KN: Anthony Mundine?
JON: Perfect.
(KN and JON shake hands on the deal)
KN: It will be great to have Quade back in the green and yellow again. At the end of the day, people talk about money but all I want is what’s best for Australian rugby.
JON: That’s actually green and gold, by the way.
KN: I guess you can take the boy out of Tokoroa but you can’t take Tokoroa out of the boy.
(JON suddenly jumps to his feet)
JON: We’d better split. Greg Growden just pulled up outside.
MD: But I’ve still got two pies to go.
QC: Hey, this ice cream tastes like sh*t.
(From: http://www.theroar.com.au/2012/10/05/aru-and-quade-cooper-contract-negotiations-gather-pace/)
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:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: